The other day I was chatting with a friend when I realised that I hadn't even bought a ticket to Sweden yet. So today I got myself a one-way flight to Stockholm for 19 May.
A one-way ticket is a very concrete reminder that I am actually doing this, not just talking and blogging about it. I guess our minds are wired to resist change and to prevent big changes from sinking in. Ignorance and denial seem to be my most powerful and instinctive reactions to change. Luckily, actions are not dictated by instincts. So I can choose to act as if I were moving to Sweden in two weeks time, even if I don't really believe I am. Funny how our minds work.
I look at my home, all tidy and ready for another viewing by potential buyers tomorrow evening. It's mine right now, but not for much longer. It's certainly better that I don't quite grasp the fact that it'll soon be someone else's home. I have plenty of time to be emotional and nostalgic later on.
It's not like this is my first or my last move. But it is different from my previous moves, since this is the first home I've bought, I've renovated and where I've stayed for six years - longer than anywhere else in my adult life. I've grown to love the area and I have even cultivated land nearby. My neighbours stop to chat with me. I even get a discount at the restaurant across the street. In short, I've settled in.
One thing I've learned over the years is that it is important for one's well-being to settle in, even in temporary situations. I settle into a flight or train ride with woolly socks, a yak's wool blanket from Nepal and something to read. Simple as that. More than anything, it is a matter of attitude. Just because something is temporary doesn't mean it deserves less care or attention. Temporary events make permanent marks on our lives. Most things in life are more or less temporary, and thus, dismissing the temporary implies dismissing life. So even if I move into a flat for only a few months, I want to settle in - make it feel like home. Home is where I lay my hat. Or, in my case, home is where I wear woolly socks.
kaunista ja viksua tekstiä ;) Myös minun aivoni hämmästyivät huomatessaan yht´äkkiä, että olin irtisanoutunut pitkäaikaisesta työstä ja hypännyt uuteen elämään. Valmistelevat puuhastelut menevät järjestyksessä ja ilman miettimistä sen syvällisemmin ja hups, mitä sitä tulikaan tehtyä. Muutos on hyvä! Onnea matkaan!
ReplyDeleteKyllä, muutos on hyvästä, vaikka pää rupeekin jossain vaiheessa vastustamaan sitä vaistomaisesti ja hirvitys kasvaa sitä mukaa, kun sisäistää, mihin onkaan itsensä pistänyt. Silloin pitää luottaa siihen, että alunperin laittoi muutoksen hyvästä syystä vireille. Kun hirvityksestä pääsee yli, muutoksesta tulee pian arkea - parhaimmillaan entistä parempaa sellaista. Onnea omaan muutokseesi!
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